Archive for November, 2005

Stamford go down 5 nil.

In general terms the least that is said about last night’s drubbing the better. Report writing this week is even further impinged as the writer was first on and the length of that tie was such that all other matches other than Glyn “the Gaylord” Williams’ had been played on the other court by the time his match was over.

First on were Alastair Gunn and Simon Richardson playing at 2 and 4 respectively.

Alastair seemed to ignore the fact that his opponent was a lefty and proceeded to try and out rally Dylan Ross for most of the match on his extremely powerful forehand. Having said that Alastair sneaked to an 8/7 lead in the first but despite approximately 82 game balls failed to close it out. A mighty effort in the 2nd saw Alastair take the second 9/7 having been 0/6 behind and then take the third 9/5. Dylan then snuck back into the game dictating the pace from the front with accurate and deceptive play to take the next two 9/4 9/3.

Simon battled hard against Dave Batterby and despite a hard push to take the second struggled to cope with Dave’s droppy lobby game and went down 2/9 10/8 3/9 1/9.

It took the time that Simon was in the shower for Mike Coogan to see off Dave Spooner 1/9 3/9 1/9. Dave was seen after the 7 minute 15 second tie rubbing tap water into his shirt to make it look as if he had done some running.

Fine performances were put in by both Jonathan Oakley and Glyn Williams who were both unlucky not to get a result the other way. Jonathan lost to Paul Partington 2/9 9/4 7/9 5/9 and Glyn was narrowly defeated by Justin Fowler 7/9 9/6 2/9 9/6 2/9.

We finished the match at 9.15pm, as we arrived on time at 7.30pm courtesy of Tim Schumacher. It is obvious that we gave them a good stuffing!

The highlight of the evening for some, may have been the cross dressing by Tim and John in the changing rooms, but the squash was more important for me. However I must admit that John was dashing in his new briefs and Tim was all the rave, with his yawning posterior gaping out from John’s delicious castaways!

Anyway back to squash:

Me, John and Paul hardly broke sweat and were looking for a game afterwards. Dave tried to break sweat with some deft underhits and I couldn’t be bothered to ask for the let tactics, but with cunning experience, he wafted away the pensioner he was playing with (his opponent).

Tim had the only game worth playing and what a game! Down 2/9 and 4/9, he dug out an incredulous comeback to 2-2. Unfortunately he pulled a knee ligament and became a hobbling cripple. All seemed lost as Tim went down 0-7 and a hobble became a worse hobble, and we all said from the balcony ‘you can do it Tim’ yeah. And believe it or believe it not Lazarus was born, with grit, graft, determination, courage, bravery, and team spirit (do you like all this crap?), Tim was magnificent and point by point got to 7-7, then 7-7, 8-7 and 9-7 to complete a most remarkable recovery, which must go down in the record books!

Stamford 5, St Neots 0

For the record the results were:-
Paul Swift beat Mike Biggs 9/4, 9/2, 9/2
Dave Spooner beat Colin Taylor 9/5, 9/7, 9/7
John Fields beat Andy Beattie 9/2, 9/2, 9/2
Paul Redfern beat Dave Bettany 9/4, 9/0, 9/0
Tim Prior beat Andy Fenner 2/9, 4/9, 9/1, 9/7, 9/7